Throwing up words

 My voice is trapped due to societal norms, I can't say the truth cuz of dignity of yours. But it hurts me everyday to see the thorn like lies covered with flowers. It kills me whenever comes the call, why can't people accept their follies and falls? They say I don't know anything, I am naive but what about the imprints that can't be vanished from my brain? Cheating is wrong I have learnt from the start, but what if those who teach you are doing wrong? Many people surrounding me, but no one to talk falling in this mud going deeper down, I can't walk. -Shruti Upadhyay

 I thought I would write something hopeful in this tough times. I took my pen and notepad and went to the roof, maybe nature becomes my muse. I always loved evenings, cold breeze crossing across your face, trying to find your beloved's face in the midst of rays. Even though the evening was cherry and peaceful there was something eerie about the evening. There was an underlying gloom well hidden in the chirps of birds or maybe it was hoots. I don't know what it was but it seemed like an intuition about the upcoming storm which will be wild. I don't have visions; I am not a sufi nor a scholar. But maybe it was a call or alert just like the thunder before the flood that swept away everyone except Noah. I was deep in my thoughts and didn't even realised that 3 hours have already passed, I registered it when there was a call for me coming from down. I collected my unused notepad and pen and descended down with a heavy heart and thousands of questions swirling by.  -Shruti Up...

 The power of weakness started engulfing me, it made me dizzy and my mind blank. My muse was lying on the bed, whimpering and babbling Maybe, she wants me to jot one last novella. I am being transported into another world, where there's happiness and no curse. I thought myself, is it really a curse that has fallen on us? Or is it the consequences of our dead done? My muse reached out for my hand, I came out of my world to the reality in front. She looked into my eyes, searching for the quest of rebel which is long gone. She is expecting me to protest, to change the world. But has she forgotten that I am already dead? Dead because what's the point of living when you can't do anything but just watch and weep. Dead because I can't blame those who have lead us to our own tomb. My muse's hold on my hand starting falling, her face turning into ecstasy. A large drop comes out of my eyes, I got up and started preparing for the burial for my muse's demise.  -Shruti Upadh...

 I don't like PDA, I said to my class softly I whispered in his ears I love when you give me small forehead kisses. Love when you hold my hand and become my shield. Look foreword to when I catch your eyes and you turn your face down with a small hint of blush on your cheeks. Love when you tuck my hair beside my ear, when you see back even if someone called my name. I love when you show your affection, love you for understanding me and accepting me as I am. After hearing my confession, he laced his fingers with mine and head for the next lecture. -Shruti Upadhyay

 I was always being taught that India is a democratic country, but is it really? Now, I think. We do have a right to choose, but where are the options to choose? You can't say a child minded leader as an option, or the one who have kept personal interest up than the national? Do we really vote by our own views,  or we give our votes because of the promise of huse? The option of NOTA is as ignored as the voice of women in terms of marriage. It seems like we are still living in monarchy when I see minister's son becoming Deputy or IRC. People have came into terms of this democracy, let it go, how it's going. -Shruti Upadhyay

 I was close to death, instead of feeling peace as people say i was scared as hell. My heart was beating frantically, my mind was blank as to what I should do. It was the time when I realised who really loves me. It's really easy to say dying is better than living but trust me when you are on the verge of dying you would find thousands of reasons to live. So, live your life to the fullest, and never regret anything because maybe for the things you are crying now would make you laugh in the near future. -Shruti Upadhyay

  Her deep breaths echoed the tiny room sitting beside her I was weaving through my thoughts and wool. She occasionally opens her heavy eyes and watches me with an expression which I couldn't put my finger on. My brother and sister left us for the city rush, and my father ran just after my mother took the bed. Her eyes are dull, there's no spark which she used to had earlier. She had nursed me for years and now it's my turn to return whatever I had lear. -Shruti Upadhyay

 I see pain in your eyes you are trying to find the glass prism but all that is left is shattered glass I am in chaos no light shining my brown hair gone is the angel only satan is left u think u can fight for me? my world is in dark now I have fallen from heaven  gone is the beautiful spotless angel I am devil with marks I want to touch you but I don't want to ruin you go in your world  no way you can make me the old one  I am not fighting with demons I have became one there is no purity in my hazel eyes u are staring at me I want to cover my dark soul from you  but you know me u gently soothe me  trying to mend my broken parts but what about my cynical soul? You would find someone like you leave  me on my own you don't belong here.. -Shruti Upadhyay

 She says she don't know the exact time when I came,  but just told me the story of my name. She told me how my family was not pleased, cuz I was a girl not a boy who will foreword their dynasty. She told me how my face was just like a diamond, how after my birth she didn't even got some almonds. She fought and stood for me, she is the only one with whom I shared moments of glee. She told me how at my time of birth, my father had gone, didn't got a chance to go to a hospital, yes I was home-born. She was concerned for me and treated me like a glass, but also trained me to fight and stand for my rights infront of mass. I will prove my worth to all and I will make my mom forget this word -"cry", I will do everything I can do to make my mom's head high... -Shruti Upadhyay

  You still play hide and seek! ain't you like 19 years old? You can try this dialogue on who's meek, not on me who can turn you blood cold. Oh!by the way how's uncle? no, not your husband talking about the plumber. Here, comes your daughter, for a 20 year old isn't she quite dull? -Shruti Upadhyay